(Mini Episode) Ego & Spirituality: Finding Harmony in a Competitive World

Ego & Spirituality

Marlena  

Hey there, my lovely listeners. Welcome to this mini episode of a witch, a mystic and a feminist. I'm your host Marlena flying solo today, which is why this is a mini episode.

Today we're diving into the world of spirituality and ego. This came up, because well, you might have heard the exciting news. Our podcast snagged the best religion and spirituality podcast award at the 18th annual People's Choice Podcast Awards in September. I was honestly blown away when they announced it in a category we had been nominated and didn't win, hearing our name read off. I remember saying, Oh, it is nice just to be nominated. So when the religion and spirituality category was announced, and they flashed our podcasts picture and said our name, the only words that came out of my mouth were, oh my god. And after the shock wore off, and yes, I did shed a few tears, I started to wonder something was a feeding my ego too much by craving awards and recognition. did this affect my spirituality? 

So let's kick things off by clarifying what I mean by ego. Think of it as this complex part of our minds that shapes how we see ourselves and the world. A big piece of the ego puzzle is our sense of self. It's that feeling of being our own unique person, separate from everyone else. The sense of self is like the lens through which we experience life, colored by our thoughts, beliefs, experiences and memories. 

Now, here's the thing. The ego loves to chat with us. We're talking about that constant inner voice, the one that narrates our life experiences, and gives its two cents on everything. Sometimes it's our biggest cheerleader. Other times, it can be quite the critic, the ego fuels competition, encouraging us to excel in different areas of our life. Whether it's our careers, sports or personal pursuits, this competitive spirit can drive innovation and progress. So the ego is a big player in our everyday lives. On one hand, it pushes us to set goals work hard, and chase our dreams. It's that inner drive that propels us forward and makes us strive for personal growth and success. Plus, the ego is responsible for our individuality. It's what makes us uniquely ourselves, our desires, preferences, and personal identity all come from the ego of ours. But the ego has got a habit of constantly sizing things up, comparing us to others, and seeking that external pat on the back. It's always evaluating how we're doing, how we look, and what we've achieved in comparison to everyone else. The never ending quest for validation can lead to feelings of not measuring up, and constantly craving approval. And when we get too wrapped up in our egos, it can lead to feelings of isolation and insecurity. It tricks us into thinking we're separate from the world and other people. This illusion of separateness can bring loneliness and a sense of emptiness. And don't get me started on attachment and resistance. It's the egos doing, it attaches us to what we want making us cling to it for happiness. And it makes us resist what we don't want, causing us loads of suffering. This cycle of craving, and aversion keeps us trapped. And let me tell you, I have a huge ego, and boy am I competitive. When I was a kid, I wasn't the smartest person. But I was a damn good athlete. And I could play any sport and excel at it. And this was how I defined myself worth as a kid. I excelled in softball playing from the age of six and playing travel ball in high school ball until I moved to Arizona. And as an adult, my self worth was defined by my career and the amount of money I made. And when I had my child, and for me, I was very much a tomboy. And as a mom, not all that maternal. So I turned to what I knew sports. I put my kid in softball, and to my dismay, they weren't that interested. I won't say they weren't good because they were playing travel ball at the age of six, but they would rather pick up rocks and put them in their pocket that actually played the game. And then we put them in martial arts. And man, were they a fucking badass, which that to fed my ego because I wasn't one of those. Let's just have fun out there kind of moms. I was the winner at all cost. And if you didn't, you didn't work hard enough kind of mom. Obviously I've changed my mindset since then. However, at the time, my kid was a World Champion Martial Artist, traveling the world competing against the best, and I birthed that beast. I'd love to take credit for all the training but that was their daddy. We spent 10 years of eating, breathing, sleeping, dreaming martial arts. We went from training in the garage to having a karate studio. So when the pandemic hit my kid quit martial arts. I had this feeling of emptiness because I didn't Know who I was without that in our lives. But at the same time, I burned out my kid and how I was burned out too. 

So while the ego has its positive and negatives, its pros and cons, we've got to strike a balance. In our spiritual journey, we're all about using the ego strengths while transcending its limitations. So now let's dive into the connection between spirituality and the ego. Many spiritual traditions say that we should get rid of the ego entirely. They see it as a barrier, keeping us from connecting deeply with the universe, or reaching a higher state of consciousness. The idea is that by shedding the ego attachments, we can tap into a profound spiritual realm beyond our individual selves. But here's the big question is wiping out the ego, the ultimate goal of spirituality? Some traditions say yes, while others have a different take. Instead of scrapping the ego completely. Some spiritual teachings encourage finding harmony between our ego and our true selves. They recognize that the ego serves practical purposes in our everyday lives. 

So how do we strike that balance? How can we navigate the material world handle our responsibilities, and live life while staying connected to our deeper selves? This is a central question in many spiritual practices. Finding balance often involves blending the ego and our essence. It's about recognizing the egos role without letting it take over. It's realizing that the ego can be a tool for growth and self expression when it works in harmony with our deeper spiritual nature. As we journey through spirituality, we'll face challenges driven by the ego, things like envy, jealousy, and the need for control. These challenges show up when we get too attached to our self image and desires. They can create suffering and slower spiritual progress. 

So how do we deal with these ego driven challenges? It starts with self awareness. By acknowledging these emotions and behaviors, we begin to understand the roots and can work on transforming them. We need to find practical ways to handle these ego based hurdles, things like mindfulness, self reflection, and cultivating compassion for others and ourselves. Remember, facing and overcoming these challenges is a part of the spiritual journey. Each challenge offers a chance for growth and deeper self understanding. 

One mighty tool for navigating the realm of spirituality and ego is self inquiry. It's all about asking the deep questions about who we are and what drives us. self inquiry helps us dig into our beliefs, values, and what's behind our actions. Through self inquiry, we become more aware of how the ego influences our desires. It helps us sort out ego driven desires that lead to suffering from genuine spiritual aspirations aligned with our higher purpose. Embracing self honesty and self inquiry isn't a quick fix. It's a lifelong journey, a constant process of discovering and growing. It's how we learn to dance with our spiritual aspirations and our ego driven desires. With more clarity and wisdom. Our spiritual path becomes richer when we accept that spiritual aspirations and ego driven desires can coexist. self inquiry and self honesty light our way towards self awareness and spiritual growth. And it's okay to feel good when you win an award for doing something that a little over a year ago, you were so afraid to do that it brought you to tears. Thank you for listening to this episode of a witch, a mystic and a feminist. I hope this episode shed some light on the interplay between spirituality and ego. Remember, self honesty and self inquiry can be powerful allies on your journey to self awareness and spiritual growth. Don't forget to swing by our website WMF pod.com. See you next time.